I looked once, then turned away. When I looked again, it was much too late.

Moral: if you go to a holiday party with your wife, do not hit on the hot vegan friend of the host. Even if you think that she is gay, based upon a comment made by your gay host and his partner, and that therefore any hitting is simply rhetorical (so to speak). Even if you think that you will be subtle in your game. You will be Not Subtle. Your wife will be Not Amused. You should, however, Not Admit that you were, in fact, doing any hitting. There is no upside there, of course.

And as it turns out, she was not gay (NTTAWWT). And apparently semi-famous, as a Google search revealed, and married to someone more semi-famous than her.

She was totally Not My Type, by the way, despite the hotness. She's vegan, for one. And with a semi-granola, hash soy brownie kind of vibe. But there was totally a spark there, as the missus noted when she threw a Hummel Madonna figurine at me at the next holiday party.

Denial, baby, denial. Even as you imgine how that yoga-toned body would feel.